Vivir

Vivir- “to live” in Spanish

I was terrified. This is my first ever tattoo (probably won’t be my last) and I was so nervous.

In the past year there have been so many really painful medical procedures (a ton of blood draws, MRI contrast injections, copaxone injections every day, the glorious PICC line from when they thought I had Lyme disease, and, of course, the spinal tap), so I guess what I was thinking is that if I could make myself go to the hospital and willingly sit down and let them put a giant needle in my spine or a 34cm tube through my vein, I can probably go get the tattoo that I’ve been wanting since high school.

For once, logic worked out for me. Often, my brain doesn’t listen to logic. This happens a lot on airplanes, where my logic is saying reasonable things like “people fly this route every day” or “air travel is the safest form of travel” but my brain is saying “what is that noise? does that mean we’re going to die? we’re going to die. DIE.” But today my brain stopped saying ridiculous things and let me get my tattoo.

Senior year, as we were all preparing to leave Barcelona, a lot of the girls started talking about getting tattoos to sort of commemorate our time there or our high school years. Ada got a feather behind her ear that looks fantastic, I don’t know if any of the others went through with it. I think “vivir” appealed to me because living in Spain was one of the first times that I really felt like I was living. Unconjugated, it doesn’t make a lot of sense, but I kind of like that it’s just “to live.” When we were learning the “acabar de” construct in Spanish and we had to take turns formulating sentences, I said “acabo de vivir, pero siempre tengo alma.” Google translate doesn’t see that the same way I do, and it was naive and teenager-y and cliched and not as poetic as I thought it was.

As my dad pointed out, very few teenage girls bring their fathers along to get their first tattoo. As I pointed out, I’m kind of terrible at being a rebel.

 

One of Those Obnoxious Music Posts + News

…but hey, at least it’s not one of those obnoxious disease posts. Since I’m now home from college and away from my magical wonderful friends who steal my heart and my time (whatever time that my classes haven’t already eaten), I’ve been listening to my ipod a lot and generally being antisocial.  JK I love my family. But anyway. Top 10 favorite songs right now are:

 

1. “California Brown and Blue” by Denison Witmer.

2. “Cherry Lips” by Garbage

3. “I’m a Goner” by Matt & Kim ft. Soulja Boy and Andrew W.K.

4. “Jesus Flag American Fish” by Cuckoo Chaos

5. “Sex and Candy” by Marcy Playground

6.  “Undertow” by Warpaint

7.  “Sunshine” by Rye Rye ft MIA

8. “The Underdog” by Spoon

9.  “I Sing I Swim” by Seabear

10. “No Intention” by Dirty Projectors

I guess another reason I’m listening to an obscene amount of music is that it is song selection time (!!) in my a cappella group. This means that we all pick two songs, email them to the group, and then everybody votes, and we do the top two songs. Very stressful. If you have any suggests for what I should propose, let me know, because I’m at a loss.

In other news, I have a doctor’s appointment (probably going to be uneventful due to the severe lack of lesions) on Wednesday and THEN (!!!!!!!) I’m getting my very first tattoo (!!!!!!!!!!!) which I am probably equal parts terrified and pumped for. I’ll post a picture if I actually go through with it. Which I will. Because I’m somehow secretly badass. Maybe.

Also, I’m switching majors (!) from neuroscience to biology (okay, not that big a deal) and considering also switching from government to english (slightly bigger deal). I guess it’s not technically “switching” since my class hasn’t gotten to declare yet (we declare in spring semester of sophomore year) but to me it feels like a switch since I already started the coursework for the majors.

Anyway, I’m gonna go bake something and talk to my lovely family because a) I’m home which means I don’t have to buy ingredients at the campus grocery store which means they don’t cost a million dollars per chocolate chip and b) I love love love my family. As my friend Kraksy would say, D’awwww….